Sexuality (Hot topics in the church)
While at one time it was impolite to discuss finances, politics, and religion, nowadays the polarizing topics that are simultaneously continually talked about, while also being taboo are sexuality, authority, and identity. We began this series generally introducing those three topics and evidences of their impact within western Christianity at large. Today we will begin addressing each of these issues specifically, beginning first with issues related to human sexuality.
Issues of human sexuality are as old as the first humans. The current tensions within many conversations about human sexuality point in a generally accusatorial direction. The accused is often the biblically faithful Christian. The supposed defendant is every sexual desire. The God of the Bible is decried as old fashioned, outdated, or simply hateful. Any person of Christian profession claiming to hold to a Biblically informed and transformed sexual ethic is deemed hostile, backwards, and bigoted. At times it is appropriate to engage with these accusations individually, but as a whole, there is a prescription within God’s Word which swiftly and overwhelming reverses the tone and balance of conversation. That prescription is simply proclaiming proactively what the scriptures declare regarding God’s ordering of human sexuality.
In the creation account God blessed Adam and Eve and gave them a mandate which included a sexual component:
God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.” (Genesis 1:28 NIV)
Any discussion of human sexual activity has to deal with this very first mention of human sexuality. As God made mankind, he made them male and female, to live in a covenantal committed exclusive relationship as a unit. The propagation of the species was a divine instruction. The status and the instructions which God gave to Adam and Eve were a blessing. This is often an aspect of the conversation on human sexuality that is twisted, ignored or misunderstood. Some seem to think that biblically committed Christians are opposed to sex, and are thereby best described as people who take no pleasure in anything under the sun. While for some this characterization may hold true, this is not because a person is maintaining faithfulness to the Bible’s understanding of sex.
Sex, from the very get go in the Biblical text, is spoken of as an imperative blessing from God. This negates any possible validity to contemporary claims that Christians hate sex, and hate people who engage in sexual activities. The biblically committed Christian only needs to reference this first page in their Bibles to refute such absurdities. Sex was a part of the blessing given by God to our first human parents.
A simple recognition of this biblical and historical truth completely flips the conversation (at least that’s what I’ve found anecdotally). Starting with Genesis 1 flips the burden of proof for the current conversations regarding human sexuality. The weight of the conversation is not on the biblically committed Christian, but rather, through proactive proclamation of what God has declared good, the burden of proof is on any who would challenge what God’s word has stated.
I’ve had conversations with individuals with some in the past who have simply shrugged at this and said they were happy to “play devil’s advocate”. I like to remind folks at that point that Satan is no one to align ourselves with, but if a person were in a position to accuse God of wrongdoing, then they would indeed find themselves on the side of the devil.
The biblically informed and transformed Christian doesn’t have a narrow view of sex, they have the broadest and most pleasure oriented view of sex possible out of every viewpoint under the sun. It is the sexual deviant who wavers from the biblical blessing who wants to experience sex in a lesser manner. At the risk of sounding “shocking” I’ll say this:
Christians who are enjoined in a covenant marriage between one man and one woman have the best possible sex because it is the only sexual experience which dwells under the blessing of the Divine Maker. No other form of human sexuality includes the Divine blessing. For the biblically informed married Christian husband and wife, sex isn’t a sneaky unspiritual side gig outside of the blessing of God. For that couple sex is a unifying expression of love to be enjoyed for the glory of God.
We who are committed to the biblical sexual ethic do more harm than good when we give up speaking proactively about sex as a good thing. Perhaps the world has shamed us, or disgusted us to the point where conversation about sex is hushed or kept quiet. To keep quiet about sex is to both ignore portions of God’s Word that are formational and instructive as well as allow for other voices beyond the Word of God to direct sexual ethics. Sex, as God has given it, is a tremendously good thing. The church cannot allow all the ways the world twists and perverts sex to dictate the conversation.
While issues related to sexual beliefs and behaviors of deviants take all the headlines, it is inappropriate for those within the church to exhaustively and exclusively speak as though all problems of human sexuality stem from what previous generations have called sexual perversions of deviations. While the headlines in the media may indeed be about every form of sexually immoral behavior, preference, and identity, we in the church take our marching orders from elsewhere. The headlines within the community of committed biblical Christians must be the blessing of positive sexual teaching as given by God through his revealed Word.
Any sexual activity outside of this covenant relationship between one man, and one woman is by definition in opposition to God’s created and designed ordinance. Any sexual preferences outside of that framework is a rejection of the stated creational blessing of God. This holds true for Christians as well. When we as Christians are in sexual sin, through our thoughts, words or deeds, repentance is the right response.
When individuals, and societies believe and behave in a manner that is outside the boundaries of what God has blessed and declared good, that is a blatant choice to exchange life abundant, for death. Rather than simply using the phrase “playing devil’s advocate” individuals and societies become advocates of their own demise when the blessings of God are traded for the rags of “alternatives”. The topic of sex, as with all other hot topics in our current age, comes down to a fundamental challenge whether or not God actually knows what he’s doing, and relatedly, if what God has done is in fact a good thing or not.
A proactive, positive, biblically transformed sexual ethic.
How ought individual Christians and the collective unified community of western Christianity engage in the midst of this era of perversion, provocation, and “perspectives”? I’m thankful that there are many far more talented, faithful examples we can look to at this moment, and many historic examples we can look back on. The Lord has never left his church blind without instruction. The presence of God’s faithful instruction is a part of the covenant blessing and promise of God to his people. Therefore, we ought not to think we need to reinvent the wheel while engaging in conversations about sexuality and living out our witness before a lost watching world. God’s Word is sufficient to put forward a positive and practical rule and guide for those who would heed its wisdom. Proactively proclaiming the foundations laid by God regarding human sexuality is the curriculum to guide the current and future generations.
For a moment consider driving as an illustration. Chances are you didn’t learn the entirety of your repertoire of skills as a driver from a single driving instructor, or a single instructional session. You’ve been a passenger in a car many times before you were trusted to drive. You’ve most likely witnessed a wide variety of different drivers who are diverse in their skill and ability. You’ve learned much about what it means to sit in the driver’s seat, before you ever sat with the sole responsibility of piloting a vehicle.
The best normative way to learn to drive a car is to experience car travel safely as a passenger for a time. After a time as passenger, a person can then be gradually and carefully instructed to become a driver. The patterns of behavior and attitudes demonstrated by the individuals driving will set an example for the student driver. Learning the rules of the road requires a mix of observational and experiential knowledge.
A person is required to learn laws and safety procedures to drive. A license is often attached to a specific age associated with accountability. The expectations of a society which values safety, and quick travel allow for an established, recognizable pattern of what is "good" driving, and what is "reckless" driving. Those who are preparing to experience the responsibility and delight of driving are not best served by exclusively being shown examples of every possible error. Could you imagine the insanity of a training curriculum for driving that attempted to explain and dissect every possible manner and method of reckless driving? The far better approach for setting forward a positive model that will be beneficial to the new driver (and other drivers on the road) will be a robust training teaching methods for safe driving. Some warnings and discussion of the consequences of reckless driving is wise and prudent. But if the whole approach were to be a curriculum of “don’t do these things”, the driving student would be sorely lacking in the positive use and proper approach to ensure best possible outcomes when the time comes to drive. A positive, proactive instruction on driving, with some detours of warnings can be normative for a society to thrive safely on the road.
Human sexuality is similar to driving in this respect. A normative way to learn about human sexuality is to observe and then later experience. To be a safe passenger for a time before ever entering the “driver’s seat”. When what is observed and experienced regarding sexuality is outside of what God has blessed and called good, the consequences are necessarily tragic. For the church to proclaim positively the whole counsel of God means the church itself must hear sermons, studies, and engage in discussions informed by passages that put forward Godly examples, as well as tragic ungodly examples.
It is normative and within the Biblical sexual ethic for children to observe what covenant relationships entail between their father and mother outside of their private bedchambers. To learn what a covenant marriage relationship ought to look like through observation. In pastoral counseling it is often the context of a couple’s upbringings that will provide a plan of action when things go well, and when things don’t go well. The instincts of men and women within marriage may sometimes (often) default to their own examples of marriages and relationships.
What occurs within the marital chambers is best taught as a continuation and expounding of what already exists and is observable in the rest of the relationship - provision, protection, help for one another, sacrificial love, mutual respect, submission, tenderness, repentance, sincerity, and delight. The blessings of God flow within this context for the human sexual experience. The church at present, and future generations will flounder and be left confused and questioning without a foundation of knowledgeable faith in what God has declared as good. Those who have been given a good deposit are entrusted to live in such a way that demonstrates the good blessing that God has given. If sex is taught everywhere else besides authoritatively from the scriptures, it is a foregone conclusion that society at large, and those within the community of God’s people will suffer. In a word, children generally thrive with good mothers and fathers loving one another through the bonds, duties, expressions, and delights of covenant marital faithfulness.
I’m thankful that as Christians today we have the authoritative Word of God which is sufficient for instructing the people of God in the ways of righteousness, as well as rebuking with a firm and corrective prescription for repentance. What preachers must preach regarding human sexuality and what congregations must earnestly receive is nothing new. The imperative of our day regarding all things sexual is to return to the old paths, and hear once again the “old, old story”. Any person who casts off the scriptures as irrelevant or ignorant of some contemporary sexual perspective cannot hold a claim to the sufficiency of scripture. God must really have messed up in a big way if something so core to the human experience as sexuality has been left without comment in sacred revelation.
Scripture is authoritative, scripture is sufficient and scripture is efficient. Not every passage of every inspired book has something to say about human sexuality. Thank God for that! God has made humanity for much more than just sex. While some might try to avoid texts within the sacred scripture about sex, and others might seemingly preach on the topic week in and week out, both of these errors come back to a neglect of the faithful proclamation of sacred scripture.
To maintain unity with 2,000 years of New Testament Christian biblical understanding, and several thousand years of Old Testament faithful biblical understanding means the church today must speak about a wide range of topics, and that includes issues related to human sexuality. I’m thankful that God, in his infinite, boundless, and merciful wisdom, has not left us on our own in this regard. Through sacred scripture faithfully proclaimed the church comes to instruction and rebuke regarding topics such as adultery, homosexuality, solo-sexuality, bi-sexuality, same sex attraction, divorce for cause, and no-fault divorce.
While plenty of groups within western Christianity are embroiled in discussions related to the most contemporary sexual topics related to LGBTQIA+, it is not an exposition on homosexuality that would be nearly so controversial (or more importantly needed) within the church at large today. Making statements about the validity and morality of no-fault divorce is a tension riddled thing to do in a western culture where such a huge portion of the population has either been through a divorce, or grown up in a divorced household. Since observing relationships is so key in the formation of an individual’s perspectives on sexuality, we must come to grips with the tragic reality that for many within western culture Mom and Dad have not always been faithful towards each other, nor have they repented of their unfaithfulness.
While it is currently a “hot” topic to discuss human sexual choices as relates homosexual and transgender behaviors and preferences, it is perhaps more grievous and saddening that sexual impurity as relates to marital fidelity is so prevalent within communities of Christians. Whenever I’ve preached on passages relating to human sexuality from the Biblical text, I’m always taken aback at just how much sin, devastation, and destruction would be avoided if marital fidelity was maintained in the first place.
Just as God has instituted one man and one woman to covenant together in a committed sexual relationship till death do them part, and that therefore excludes all sorts of sexual perversions, so too God’s institution of marriage has also excluded no-fault divorce. A break of the covenant marriage relationship is allowed for within specific circumstances, but those circumstances are hardly the sole cause of the proliferation of divorce within the west.
One of the Godly mentors I’m thankful to have had disciple me in life and the scriptures was Rev. Jason Helopoulos. In the days leading up to my wedding, he gave some sage wisdom that holds true for the individual, and for the society:
“As long as you are not married, the evil one will do all he can to get you into as many beds as possible. Once you are married, the evil one will do all he can to keep you from your marriage bed as much as possible”.
It is no wonder in a culture surrounded by so many fleshly temptations, that the individual and the society would be trapped in a mire of sexual pervasiveness, perversion, and panic. We may be tempted to say as we examine our moment in history to cry “God help us all”. Maybe that earnest plea would be right. Jonah when in the belly of the great fish cried out to God in prayer. To weep and repent is always the right response when confronted with the truth of our sin through God’s word.
Yet our weeping ought to be the sort that is attached to true repentance. Meaning confession of sin as well as new choices in living. A new choice for western Christianity of the current era, broadly speaking, would be a rigorous exposition of the positive biblical sexual ethic. Not to always be reacting, but to instead proactively set a foundation for the next generation of covenant people. To proclaim loudly within the pulpit, pew, homes, conversations, and in lives, that God has gifted humanity with sex. To rest in God’s wonderful creation of sex as very delightfully, wonderfully, majestically good, when it is experienced between one man, and one woman in a committed monogamous covenant relationship. All other experiences qualify as reckless driving for those involved, and for the society which allows, endorses, and celebrates alternatives.
Let no one say with any merit or evidence, that the God of the scriptures hates human sexuality, or that the biblical sexual ethic is limiting on delight. Mankind’s greatest delight is experienced in glorying God. The God who has made sex has blessed sex within the bonds of covenant committed marital relationship between one man and one woman. As biblically committed Christians we can proactively proclaim that God’s gift of sex is (to quote Genesis 1:31) “very good”.
Further Reading: